These stories are true to my memory, and we all know how reliable the mind is. But even if they are missing a few details or the order of events is mixed up, the stories we remember of our childhood are some of the best there are. Where else can you read of elusive criminals that break all the rules and still are thought fondly of?

 

Stolen Sugar

 

One day when I was little, I stole some chocolate frosting from the fridge. I knew I wasn’t supposed to have any so I decided to eat it under my parents’ computer desk which I fit nicely in. My mom was outside at the time, but I still felt nervous, so I decided I would lock the door. But you see, the doors in our house could be unlocked with anything long and flat. We usually used screwdrivers, so I quietly took the ones in the living room with me. The rest were already there in the back bedroom. Then I was set, so I happily snacked on my chocolate.

 

The ironic part of this is that I don’t even like chocolate that much anymore. I definitely wouldn’t try to eat a whole tub of frosting now. I usually take frosting off my cake. It’s just so rich. I prefer softer sweet flavors.

 

Eventually, my mom did notice I had locked myself in her room, but she had trouble getting in. I had done my job well. She gave in to bribing me out with the promise of a popsicle. After eating a ton of frosting, a popsicle sounded perfect. I was nervous to open the door, but I did have to leave at some point. Once I did, I got quite the spanking. And a popsicle. You gotta keep your word with kids, or they won’t ever believe you. All in all, it was a good day for little me, but I was all chocolated out and did not tempt fate a second time.

 

“Dancing” in the Rain

 

It was a rainy day, and in Texas, the rain usually pours and makes giant puddles, lakes in the road, and rivers down the sides. I loved playing in the puddles and “rivers” when I was tiny. I asked my mom if this day if I could play in them once it was just sprinkling. Mom thought about it and said no, “I don’t want you to get your clothes muddy today.” “Oh,” I said sadly, walked away. Then I thought, I know how to keep my clothes clean!

 

The next thing my mom heard were cars honking outside. She looked out the window and saw cars slowing down when they got to our house. She went outside and found me playing in the puddles. But I wasn’t getting my clothes muddy. No, I was smart and I took my clothes all off.

 

Photo by Reza Shayestehpour

 

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